Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Why Women Cry

Last night, my husband and I had a fight, and I cried. Three things seem to push and shove their way between us, causing tension. Every time, these three hiccups end up making me cry. 

1. Invalidated feelings
2. A forced apology
3. Awkward endings to the argument

These situations flow one by one when my husband and I fight. And let me add, we rarely argue unless these processions occur after I've expressed how my feelings have been hurt. Hence, I'm already feeling vulnerable and sensitive - pleading for his love. Without going into great detail about the context of our fights (because those serve as bigger and better blog posts), I always end up sulking in the bathroom, watching my snotty nose run in the mirror and choking over sobs. 

The funny thing is, I don’t dramatize myself to try to make my husband apologize faster or make him feel sorry for me. I’m not dramatizing myself at all. That’s just me. I can’t help it. I’m dramatic.

I’m dramatic about my husband. He always asks me why I’m still crying after we’ve made up. I cry over the fact we wasted time fighting and arguing while we could have been spending that time laughing or cuddling or anything else positive. And it makes me sad, so I cry.

I cry because every time we fight, I feel wounded. Those hurt feelings will recover over time, but girls need their men to comfort them and tell them it’s okay. It’s like a mourning period. For some of us – ME – every fight is like that. I hope that men will know that us women only do that because we love our husbands so very much.

13 comments:

  1. I have Followers it This post is really very interesting. and informative. Thanks for sharing with us.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sure :) Thanks for reading. I think transparency and honesty are very important to growing spiritually and emotionally. We can all learn from each other.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I feel for you, but you know what? it's ok, cry if you want to, nobody has to understand that just let it be. Perhaps your husband cares about it or what but men are not like us,so he might not be willing to tell.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi, Amber! Found you on Bloggers.com. I definitely agree with you about the invalidated feelings--that will get me to cry just about every time!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thanks, Ladies!!

    Anji, I've been looking at your blog, Our Life On Christ. It rock! You should check out www.faithvillage.com. I work for them. We are an up and coming social network website for faith resources. I think y'all would find it a very good fit for your blog. :) Btw, thanks for posting that video of Level 3:16 and t.Jay. Love it!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks, Michelle! Yes, I love "Love" by Level 3:16 and T.Jay! We will post more great songs. :) I will check out FaithVillage.com soon (or soon-ish since we will be traveling for the holidays)!

    ReplyDelete
  7. great post and also thank you for following me on bloggers.com I look forward to reading more of what you have to say. And continue to let that light so every shine amen

    God bless you and yours
    The Devotion Cafe
    http://chosenwoman.wordpress.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Desiray. I appreciate your encouraging comments. I look forward to reading your blog as well.

      Delete
  8. You have a soft heart. That is good. I tear up easily, even after 27 years of marriage. Have a wonderful day.

    http://theemptynestexpress.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's good to know! Thank you for commenting and encouraging me. Hope you have a fabulous rest of the week. :)

      Delete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...